Listen, no for real listen. If there is one thing life has taught me, it's that you can't stay stuck in the same place. You have to get off of your ass and do something about it. So in light of this.... I did a thing.......
So I joined some singles groups on social media. I wasn't really looking for anything other than some conversation. Little did I know that I would end up with way more than I bargained for. Upon posting my picture and introducing myself, I received some very warm welcomes. To my surprise I also got a few private messages. However one person definitely stood out among the rest. As we all do, I had to look her profile a bit and also check some of her pictures. I didn't see any craziness so I replied to her message. ...
Real talk that was June 5th and we have been in conversation ever since. This is something I truly needed. It is interesting and a huge refreshing new thing for me, well for us. One step at a time right? Well I am getting to know her pretty well and she would be able to say the same. Until then I will enjoy the moment.
Sometimes when you have a bad breakup or things just aren't going the way you want them to, you need a fresh start. When the doubt, disappointment, sadness, fear, and just hopelessness all try to gang up on you, you have to fight back. When you fight back you begin to see that the world and your options are much more expansive and available than you might think. Don't allow yourself to get boxed in. Fight back. Remember to take care of yourself mentally, physically, and financially.
Love, Peace, and Happiness...
Sunday, July 5, 2020
Wednesday, June 10, 2020
So this happened.....
What's going on? You ight? You good? Covid 19 A.K.A. Corona Virus still fucking up your life too? 2020 still whooping yo ass too? Yeah me too. Ohhh yeah my relationship is over. Where I am today and in this moment tells me it is over for good on all levels. It wasn't pretty, it wasn't fun, and it wasn't expected at all. Real talk, I can't even talk about it in this post like I originally planned because I don't really know what I want to say about it. Instead I will talk about what I am feeling right now.
Needless to say this shit sucks! You court, you plan, you love, you cater, you do the " right " things and end up back in the land of the singles. I honestly thought I was done with this, but clearly I was wrong. The part of this that is the hardest to deal with is the self reflection. Yes I had conversations with her and asked questions for the sake of closure, but when someone lies to you, can you really trust anything they say? You're kinda left to your own devices and thoughts. " Was it all a lie? Was I good enough? Why? Was the sex bad? Did you love me? What did I do wrong? Why are you an asshole? How could you do this to me? " etc etc and all that. So now I have to decided is Rob will still be Rob or will Rob say f it . Yes it is easy to say " Just be you. Stay true to yourself. It was them not you." however, when things happen to you more than once, you tend to take a longer look into the mirror. After all, " You" are really the only thing you have control over. It is the only variable that you can change and adjust moving forward so it becomes quite tempting when you end up in situations like this.
Real talk.... again.... I think I will be ight. A lot of things if my life are right where I need them be. I am in position to comfortably make some moves I have literally been dreaming about. I have to de-clutter my mind. Things are different now. Am I sad and hurt and all those things? Yes, however I tend to be optimistic. I know time will heal my wounds, but I also don't want to lose sight of what's in front of me. I don't want to drown in sorrow and sadness. I want to use it to fuel my fire. I got shit to do man. Like on so real shit, I have things I want to really accomplish out here in this world.
When I am ready and a bit more clear I will tell you about what happened. I feel like if I do it right now it just won't come out right. Sometimes it is best to let things sit for a minute before you address them. So yeah i'm going to leave that there.
Peace, Love, and Happiness...
Sunday, May 3, 2020
New!
Yerrrrrrrrr, Yeah I know, I haven't posted in a while but i'm back. I have transitioned and moved and I am settled in now. Ahhhh..Life is grand Lately I have been working hard at accepting something new. It hasn't been easy honestly and a lot of people have dealt with this. It is and it isn't that serious depending on the type of person that you are. So as usually I will give ya'll the real. My lady is absolutely beautiful, fine, gorgeous, attractive, desirable, exotic, sexy, and all of those other adjectives. This isn't a problem at all I promise. It isn't a bad thing either. It is just a thing and it isn't a thing. It is whatever I decide to make it really. Rob, get on with it! Ok damn. As a man who is an introvert and pretty low key, it is taking me time to adjust to this attention. Yes I know the attention isn't mine directly per say, but I support her and view her content so I see things. No I am not looking for anything, but who doesn't scroll through comments every now and again. Now before you talk your shizzle, I am not the type to tell you what to wear, you can't go here, who is that guy, where you at, who texting you, who calling you, why you ain't call me back, over protective guy. So no I am not making a big deal out of anything. I'm just saying I notice das it. Yes I said das.
Now this is why it is a thing and it isn't a thing. It is a thing because as a man I am very big on respect. There is nothing worse than disrespect. So I keep an eye out for the " Overly Friendly " shiznit. It is the dude in me and I have been through some things so don't judge me. Yes, I heard you over there, " Wow so you don't trust her?" on the contrary, I trust her with damn near everything. As a man I am protective and men deal with things differently than woman do at times. Yes my lady can curve people and let them know she isn't interested, but it is different when a man lets someone know to step off. It sends a different type of message. Back to the point, I see things and I notice things and I gotta eat that sometimes just like we all do. Now real shit, some stuff use to bother the FUCK out of me. Like really bother the fuck out of me. I didn't bring them up or make them an issue because I recognized and understood it was a me thing not an us or her thing. However, overtime I have learned to relax and take things in, think, process and keep myself grounded. Now if I was the guy I mentioned earlier in this paragraph, then our shit would have been over before it ever started. So yeah this is why it could be a thing. Dudes are dudes, and people are people and we feel things and we react. That reaction will cause other things to take place. That is why I always like to think before I act. I know that my action is only the beginning and what happens next is on me as well regardless of what led me to take action. It is always a two way street, or three, or four.
So, why isn't it a thing? Honestly it isn't a thing because of the most simple reason. The reason most women give and the reason most people think of. " She is with you. She comes home to you. She is making love to you. She is going out with you. She is spending time with you." That is the honest truth when you think about it. When you really sit back a marinate on that, you will come to find that those things are the most important. Yes as people we tend to want more or we look and over obsess. Breathe, calm yourself, and relax. Learn to let the little things go because a lot of the time it is nothing. You must also learn to recognize when something is serious and needs to be addressed. Think about what the most important things are and focus on that. If some of those fall into a category that you feel isn't being fulfilled, have the conversation.
Alrighty so, final thoughts.At the end of the day you have to learn to vent and find a release. Don't drive yourself crazy. Don't obsess over things. Have the conversation and let the conversation be the end of that. If you have to keep rehashing it, that is a different story. You also have to learn to let things go and accept things for what they are. Sometimes once you have processed things, had the conversation, and seen the results, it will tell you all that you need to know.
Love, Peace, and Blessings.
Rob
Now this is why it is a thing and it isn't a thing. It is a thing because as a man I am very big on respect. There is nothing worse than disrespect. So I keep an eye out for the " Overly Friendly " shiznit. It is the dude in me and I have been through some things so don't judge me. Yes, I heard you over there, " Wow so you don't trust her?" on the contrary, I trust her with damn near everything. As a man I am protective and men deal with things differently than woman do at times. Yes my lady can curve people and let them know she isn't interested, but it is different when a man lets someone know to step off. It sends a different type of message. Back to the point, I see things and I notice things and I gotta eat that sometimes just like we all do. Now real shit, some stuff use to bother the FUCK out of me. Like really bother the fuck out of me. I didn't bring them up or make them an issue because I recognized and understood it was a me thing not an us or her thing. However, overtime I have learned to relax and take things in, think, process and keep myself grounded. Now if I was the guy I mentioned earlier in this paragraph, then our shit would have been over before it ever started. So yeah this is why it could be a thing. Dudes are dudes, and people are people and we feel things and we react. That reaction will cause other things to take place. That is why I always like to think before I act. I know that my action is only the beginning and what happens next is on me as well regardless of what led me to take action. It is always a two way street, or three, or four.
So, why isn't it a thing? Honestly it isn't a thing because of the most simple reason. The reason most women give and the reason most people think of. " She is with you. She comes home to you. She is making love to you. She is going out with you. She is spending time with you." That is the honest truth when you think about it. When you really sit back a marinate on that, you will come to find that those things are the most important. Yes as people we tend to want more or we look and over obsess. Breathe, calm yourself, and relax. Learn to let the little things go because a lot of the time it is nothing. You must also learn to recognize when something is serious and needs to be addressed. Think about what the most important things are and focus on that. If some of those fall into a category that you feel isn't being fulfilled, have the conversation.
Alrighty so, final thoughts.At the end of the day you have to learn to vent and find a release. Don't drive yourself crazy. Don't obsess over things. Have the conversation and let the conversation be the end of that. If you have to keep rehashing it, that is a different story. You also have to learn to let things go and accept things for what they are. Sometimes once you have processed things, had the conversation, and seen the results, it will tell you all that you need to know.
Love, Peace, and Blessings.
Rob
Sunday, March 3, 2019
10 or so
Life has a funny way of making you take the long way to your destination. If you haven't read my other posts, then you will miss some things in this one, but it's kool. I find myself in a place I have never been before. Comfortable, afraid, happy, and without a doubt in love. I know what kinda mix is that right?
10 or so is referring to the years we have know each other. We met being adventurous and really took a risk on each other, but from the beginning we knew something was there. You know that feeling of " I don't ever want to see you anyone else" or "We could never be just friends" ? Yeah that has always been us. Like either we talked everyday and grew closer, or we completely left each other alone. Oh my bad, for the " Well what was the problem?" people, distance and immaturity make is very hard to be with someone even if you love them. A lot of distance, like a whole lot. So the thoughts, feelings, and intentions were there, but the circumstances and timing was trash.
Fast forward through years of conversations, Skype calls, an Atlanta rendezvous, and a Jamaican escape from it all where I finally said " I love you." and here we are. One thing that always seems to present an issue for most people when it comes to their feelings is time. Welp check! 10 years and counting. We are both very sure at this point. Ok now the immaturity. Welp we have both had other relationships, sitiationships, dates, and life experiences that we have both learned from which has greatly increased our appreciation for each other so... CHECK! Huh? Wha? Oh the distance... yeah so with that life experience I mentioned, we both ended up wanting to relocate..... Now the best part is, we are relocating for our own personal goals and reasons, it just so happens that where we both want to be isn't far apart at all. Matter of fact, she is already there so I am playing a bit of catch up.
No jumping through hoops, no trying to " PROVE" anything, no damn games, no fronting. The funny thing is, from the beginning there never was. We just took each other for who we were and who we currently are. We are ourselves with each other, farting, burping and nakedness. All we have to do is continue to love each other and treat each other with the respect we have for each other.. I mean I need to move too, but you get it. She is my #1. She is artsy, intelligent, talented, compassionate, sexy, understanding, and supportive. She is everything I want and need to feel completed. I truly feel like we were made for each other. I have never been this free with anyone. Being able to have a real conversation where your thoughts and feelings are valued and received vs being dismissed and judged is everything. That shit feels great! Think of every wonderful, comforting, exciting, and joyful feeling you have every had and have yet to experience and that is what we have between us. I can't describe it. Like imagine if you were to wish for 10 million dollars and that shit just appeared and you were ready to receive it? Like you had a plan set up in place to triple or quadruple it immediately. No uncertainty, no lack in confidence, just preparedness.
Yeah that is where our emotions are. Notice how I am using the word "we". Our level of communication is on 10000000000000000000000000. Nothing is really off limits and we always let each other know how we feel. We are without a doubt best friends. Every time we separated from each other and came back over the years, it was like we never left. Wanna know the scary part? We naturally have a ton of things in common. Like down to the lazy do nothing weekends stay in the bed and eat junk food kinda things lol. We literally talk everyday and the conversation is always new and refreshing. We feed each others craving for wanting more out of life, and we push each other to pursue our passions. We are partners in crime and love lol. I don't even like talking to people all that much unless there is a purpose behind the conversation. Her voice, thoughts, feelings, and opinions are my daily dose of comfort and peace. My day would be truly be incomplete without a single word from her.
This is where I am today. I am working on transitioning to the next part of my journey in life. I can't wait to see what is next. I can't wait to experience new things with my lovely lady. I am also looking forward to new opportunities and my big move whenever that happens. I still have some mental land mines and junk to sort through, but overall I am truly at peace. Life can and will happen. That's about it. If you are reading this, thank you for taking the time explore my inner most thoughts. I hope something I wrote helps you along in your journey.
Love, Peace, and Happiness
Robert Wilson Jr.
10 or so is referring to the years we have know each other. We met being adventurous and really took a risk on each other, but from the beginning we knew something was there. You know that feeling of " I don't ever want to see you anyone else" or "We could never be just friends" ? Yeah that has always been us. Like either we talked everyday and grew closer, or we completely left each other alone. Oh my bad, for the " Well what was the problem?" people, distance and immaturity make is very hard to be with someone even if you love them. A lot of distance, like a whole lot. So the thoughts, feelings, and intentions were there, but the circumstances and timing was trash.
Fast forward through years of conversations, Skype calls, an Atlanta rendezvous, and a Jamaican escape from it all where I finally said " I love you." and here we are. One thing that always seems to present an issue for most people when it comes to their feelings is time. Welp check! 10 years and counting. We are both very sure at this point. Ok now the immaturity. Welp we have both had other relationships, sitiationships, dates, and life experiences that we have both learned from which has greatly increased our appreciation for each other so... CHECK! Huh? Wha? Oh the distance... yeah so with that life experience I mentioned, we both ended up wanting to relocate..... Now the best part is, we are relocating for our own personal goals and reasons, it just so happens that where we both want to be isn't far apart at all. Matter of fact, she is already there so I am playing a bit of catch up.
No jumping through hoops, no trying to " PROVE" anything, no damn games, no fronting. The funny thing is, from the beginning there never was. We just took each other for who we were and who we currently are. We are ourselves with each other, farting, burping and nakedness. All we have to do is continue to love each other and treat each other with the respect we have for each other.. I mean I need to move too, but you get it. She is my #1. She is artsy, intelligent, talented, compassionate, sexy, understanding, and supportive. She is everything I want and need to feel completed. I truly feel like we were made for each other. I have never been this free with anyone. Being able to have a real conversation where your thoughts and feelings are valued and received vs being dismissed and judged is everything. That shit feels great! Think of every wonderful, comforting, exciting, and joyful feeling you have every had and have yet to experience and that is what we have between us. I can't describe it. Like imagine if you were to wish for 10 million dollars and that shit just appeared and you were ready to receive it? Like you had a plan set up in place to triple or quadruple it immediately. No uncertainty, no lack in confidence, just preparedness.
Yeah that is where our emotions are. Notice how I am using the word "we". Our level of communication is on 10000000000000000000000000. Nothing is really off limits and we always let each other know how we feel. We are without a doubt best friends. Every time we separated from each other and came back over the years, it was like we never left. Wanna know the scary part? We naturally have a ton of things in common. Like down to the lazy do nothing weekends stay in the bed and eat junk food kinda things lol. We literally talk everyday and the conversation is always new and refreshing. We feed each others craving for wanting more out of life, and we push each other to pursue our passions. We are partners in crime and love lol. I don't even like talking to people all that much unless there is a purpose behind the conversation. Her voice, thoughts, feelings, and opinions are my daily dose of comfort and peace. My day would be truly be incomplete without a single word from her.
This is where I am today. I am working on transitioning to the next part of my journey in life. I can't wait to see what is next. I can't wait to experience new things with my lovely lady. I am also looking forward to new opportunities and my big move whenever that happens. I still have some mental land mines and junk to sort through, but overall I am truly at peace. Life can and will happen. That's about it. If you are reading this, thank you for taking the time explore my inner most thoughts. I hope something I wrote helps you along in your journey.
Love, Peace, and Happiness
Robert Wilson Jr.
Saturday, January 19, 2019
Make Sure You Are Heard.
Yerrrrrrrrr! Hello. So if you don't know I have a podcast " From My Experience Podcast" you can find it everywhere you listen to podcasts. I just wanted to put that out there because it goes with the title. I really believe that we all have a voice. We all have something to say. We all have things that at some point in time we will need to express. So....... make sure you are heard. Now, yes we have freedom of speech, but taking advantage of that can be costly. The point is, you have to let it out. You have to speak up. You need to find a way to express yourself in a meaningful way. There are endless ways you can interpret this, but I will just stick to communication in general. You have to be able to talk to each other. The tricky thing is, we all communicate differently and we all receive differently. It takes time to develop effective communication with someone. It also takes love and desire. I mean let's be honest, you can truly cancel anyone at anytime and choose not to deal with them at all and keep it moving. However, it will hinder you from learning how to communicate with a variety people. Why does that matter? It matters because you never know who you will need to make it to the next level. It doesn't mean you have to best friends, but there are a lot of benefits to even just a business relationship. I don't think anyone can truly teach you how to communicate, but one of the keys is to be able to look within yourself and understand that you are not perfect and you could always benefit from change. I am pretty open minded and that definitely helps. I also have a greater understanding of myself as a person. I know who and what I am willing to deal with and put up with. What does that mean? It means I can communicate with someone, listen to what they have to say, pay attention to their habits, motivations, and how it aligns with who I am. If it doesn't line up, then I know how to make the decision to either stay and work on things, or part ways. Parting ways isn't a bad thing. Everyone isn't meant to be in your life forever, at least that's what I believe. We are all in a world where we are trying to find our way by developing relationships, working, and pursuing our goals. It really is that simple on the surface. Communication is the key. Work on you communication and watch how things will change in your life. You will truly be shocked. I will leave it at that.
So in closing, excuse any grammatical errors. I literally sit down and write these things when I am feeling how I am feeling. I may come back later and clean them up eventually. I hope that you have learned something from this and that you can use it to better your life.
Peace, Love, and Happiness
Rob
So in closing, excuse any grammatical errors. I literally sit down and write these things when I am feeling how I am feeling. I may come back later and clean them up eventually. I hope that you have learned something from this and that you can use it to better your life.
Peace, Love, and Happiness
Rob
Tuesday, November 20, 2018
Sleepless Excitement
I am up at 2:20 AM on November 21st 2018 watching " The Last Kingdom" Season 3 on Netflix. One of my nearest and dearest friends is getting married in Jamaica this coming Sunday and I am meeting a very special lady there for an extended weekend of relaxation and pleasure. I guess all the excitement has me up.Work has been kicking my ass and has added a shit ton of stress, but things are looking up on that front as well. I just wanted to take a moment to reflect and be grateful for something to look forward to in this crazy world. Sometimes you have to just stop and smell the roses. Oh by the way Pepperidge Farm makes some bomb ass cookies SHEESH.
Peace, Love, and Happiness
Peace, Love, and Happiness
Sunday, July 29, 2018
Sea of Thoughts
It is 3:52 AM I got two warm... 1 warm krispy kreme doughnut in front of me while I binge " Insecure " while feeling insecure. That's some wild shit at 33. It is what it is though. To tell you the truth an old aching thought has reared it's ugly head. " I wanna be married with a house and kids and a dog I ain't even want. Oh yeah and that nice house." That was the original thought, but it has simply evolved. " This ain't where I though I would be in my life at this age." . I know I am not alone in this. My friends and I have discussions about it and that definitely helps to talk things out. That is why it is important to have a tight inner circle...... Ight off that though. In my sea of thoughts, there is just too much for me to sort through. Instead of fighting against the waves crashing against me, I just let them consume me. Why you say? Honestly I have kinda just learned to float on top of the water. Yeah I get taken under sometimes and sometimes I swallow too much water. Hell sometimes I even throw up because the tossing and turning can get to be too much. However, every storm comes to an end. Some storms may be longer than others but they all do eventually come to an end. The short storms become laughable after you have been through a few of them. The long storms are a different story.
Ight so straight up, you have to be super careful with those storms. They tend to let a lot of doubt and self-pity seep in. Once that overtakes you, it will be hard for you recognize when the storm is truly over. You will be in a state of mind that is a determent to your development. I believe there are signs that let you know the storm is easing up, but if you aren't focused, you can end up turning yourself around and running back into the storm instead of cruising into the sunset. Again, having someone to talk to is important, but there is something much more important than that. ACTION.
( WARNING STRONG PERSONAL BELIEF!) If you are not taking actions towards your own progression, you will fail and you will stay stuck in the same place. We all need help. We all have the right to seek help and counsel and all those good things, but you will end up by yourself and you will be faced with decisions that have an impact. The questions is what are you doing? It is my experience that if you aren't willing to help yourself or at least show that you care about yourself on some level, others will be far less willing to bend over backwards for you. You are very visible when you reach out for help. You are inviting attention so naturally people are going to keep an extra eye on you in hopes that you are getting better so keep that in mind. I said all that to say make sure you are making a true effort to progress and better yourself.
Peace, Love, and Joy to you all.
Ight so straight up, you have to be super careful with those storms. They tend to let a lot of doubt and self-pity seep in. Once that overtakes you, it will be hard for you recognize when the storm is truly over. You will be in a state of mind that is a determent to your development. I believe there are signs that let you know the storm is easing up, but if you aren't focused, you can end up turning yourself around and running back into the storm instead of cruising into the sunset. Again, having someone to talk to is important, but there is something much more important than that. ACTION.
( WARNING STRONG PERSONAL BELIEF!) If you are not taking actions towards your own progression, you will fail and you will stay stuck in the same place. We all need help. We all have the right to seek help and counsel and all those good things, but you will end up by yourself and you will be faced with decisions that have an impact. The questions is what are you doing? It is my experience that if you aren't willing to help yourself or at least show that you care about yourself on some level, others will be far less willing to bend over backwards for you. You are very visible when you reach out for help. You are inviting attention so naturally people are going to keep an extra eye on you in hopes that you are getting better so keep that in mind. I said all that to say make sure you are making a true effort to progress and better yourself.
Peace, Love, and Joy to you all.
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